Samhain

Oct. 31st, 2011 06:23 pm
teiresias: (Default)
 Had a very interesting observation session on the bus this morning: four guys speaking some Scandinavianish language (not Norwegian, not Swedish, almost certainly not Danish-- Icelandic or Finnish, I think) that I couldn't understand, and once I stopped trying to figure out what language it actually was and where one word ended and another began, then I just fell into 5E mode and listened to the cadences of the Sound, and it was so clear, the Fire mostly, but that was the mask, and beneath it some Water, some Earth... it was quite astounding how much I could get without engaging my head.

A woman sat next to me with a very complex Odor, something dry and almost tannic, reminiscent mostly of Metal with a bit of Wood thrown in. Also, I learned today that Dr. Martin apparently is quite sure that I'm Metal/Earth/?. This is exciting, mostly because there's at least one person in this city who'll stamp the final destination on my passport.

Our class is really starting to come together into a cohesive unit; there're a lot of good ideas and really vibrant energies coalescing, and I think we're all going to work quite well together. Also, SIOM has agreed to a teachout in case our appeal to ACCAOM is denied, so things are looking very hopeful all across the board.
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 Had what, in the main, was actually a quite enjoyable appointment at the Bastyr clinic on Stone Way today. I knew exactly how the student naturopaths were feeling, and it made me all the more eager to actually get my needles into some patients of my own. Which will never happen if I can't get more observation hours-- damn 5E people for being shitty marketers, anyway.

Still, things are happening and I'm doing everything I can possibly do to make sure that things are taken care of. I'm not even that worried, amazingly enough. Just followin' the Tao...
teiresias: (Default)
 Have just returned from what I hope will be the first of many successful meetings with new friends from the internet, whom I of course hope to turn into patients. Having reached the conclusion that I am terrible at marketing and thus need all the help I can get, I am utilizing every possible social networking platform I can get my hands on in order to reach those who need my help (which is everyone, whether or not they choose to acknowledge it).

That sounds arrogant, perhaps? Nevertheless, I believe it's true. It's not just my care, of course; there are other acupuncturists, chiropractors, naturopaths, massage therapists, etc. It is inescapable that, for everyone (who doesn't have an exceptionally hardy constitution and set of longevity genes), wellness care is essential to true health. The more people I can help to stay out of the pill-pushing clutches of allopathic medicine (which can sometimes be necessary, don't get me wrong; no one's better than an allopath when it comes to critical care), the better.

Regular wellness care keeps more serious problems from developing, and that saves everyone more money in the long run. 
teiresias: (Default)
 Some things I learned from the WEAMA rep: the association was founded in 1985. It costs $180/yr. for a license as of now, but back when the association started it was $900/yr. (!) This money, of course, goes to pay our lobbyists in Olympia to keep chipping away at the list of things we aren't allowed to do as part of our scope of practice; the WEAMA board is all-volunteer. 

Sadly, WA is in the bottom 25% of states as far as getting L&I money from the government-- not that it matters to acupuncturists currently, because we aren't allowed to bill them under workers' comp claims. That should change soon, or so we hope. There are only about 750 licensed acupuncturists in WA, which seems a bit low to me. 

Finally, it was Sen. Paull Shin, D-Edmonds, who made it so we're "East Asian Medicine Practitioners" instead of "Oriental Medical Practitioners" or just "acupunturists." 

More info at RCW 18.06.
teiresias: (Default)
 "Because here, it's not about me. Astringently. And I don't know how else to make that clear: I get it. I think it's silly, and I think it's a function and a symptom of white middle-class privilege, in the absence of realistic motivation to get angry about sexism in your own, actual life. Which offends me, because it's past time to start the actual riot. And instead, fake Internet feminism and privileged white-girl Internet anger gets tied up in dumb TV shows and not real life, and we all bitch to the online echo chamber of people who already agree with us, and it becomes a game of oneupmanship about who gets to be the most offended, and everything is lost to the competition. The smartest, angriest, most wonderful young women and gay men fall to the pettiest competition of all, and we're the only ones that don't benefit. And I don't know how to combat that, because we all do what's easiest, unless we have to do otherwise.

Dair Shipper: "But you're a man! You're mansplaining!"
I guess so: "As long as you look at gay men as being privileged above sexism, as though homophobia is a separate issue and not the other side of the exact same issue, you are never going to understand that we're under the same pressure. Just as you wanted."
Hopeful Feminist: "But you are a man! A white man!"
Sure, and: "You have privileges of your own. The privilege to identify with abuse victims. The privilege to co-opt and identify with a gay male identity you barely understand. The privilege to get married. The privilege to play in the universal softball game known as heterosexuality."
Fake Internet Feminist: "So you're saying we shouldn't think of you as men?"
The Only Men Who Actually Carry Fractionally The Same Burden As You: "Think of us as double agents. That's how we've always thought of you."

Jacob, ladies and gentlemen.
teiresias: (Default)
It's generally a poor idea to discuss CF with a patient; even the general concept can get people thinking too much, getting stuck in their heads and intellectualizing their treatments when they should just experience them as part of the Tao. 

Saying things like that still feels like a bit of a cop-out to me, but I don't know any better words to describe it than the quasi-religious mysticism that's come down to us from Asia. I'm not the least bit religious; faith doesn't make much sense to me, conceptually. I feel what the needles do to me,and I observe the various levels of effect once the treatments are done. I mean, hell, I don't crave wheat any more! The thought of eating it makes me feel vaguely ill, even, and that is something that happened after a little more than a year of acupuncture. It might not sound like much to some, but to me, it's huge, revelatory, a sea change I never thought I'd experience.

Some things to be Earthy-grateful for: my parents, Jacqui and Gabriel, my support system which is vast and strong and which I must strive continually to deserve.
teiresias: (Default)
 I've been walking a lot more recently, which neatly accomplishes the dual goal of exercising more and spending less. I can do five miles and not feel the least bit tired, though apparently the muscles on the lateral edge of my feet (the flexor digitorum brevis, I believe) need strengthening, because walking that far in my Vibrams makes them rather sore (but only on one side at a time-- first it was the left, now it's the right. I dunno, man).

I love Vibrams because they give my feet freedom of movement, and allow me to feel more grounded and connected to the earth; for me, who often allows his head to drift among the clouds, that's very important.

Treatment yesterday featured the outer AEPs, which was new to me; the points actually developed superficial blisters that only lasted until that evening, but were rather itchy. It's amazing how different some points feel from others-- command points feel like a freight train made of lightning rocketing all the way up from my toes, while the back points are more subtle, almost languorous. I look forward to the day when I can afford to get treated on a weekly basis, so as to more fully experience the range of sensations available.

Gotta say, having a Window of the Sky done was disappointing, after all the fanfare we got about them in class. Of course, it may simply be that my system needs time to process the full import of the point. I really want to get my hands on a copy of Debra Kaatz's book so I can become more familiar with the nature of each individual point.
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 So, no accreditation from ACCAOM. This is not entirely surprising, as accreditation is a giant extortion scheme no matter what your subject might be, but still, it sucks. I mean, I pretty much knew I was going to have to go to Bastyr anyway, but I thought I'd have a little bit more time to get used to actually BEING AN ACUPUNCTURIST and making actual money. Still, if I get to make some contacts with people who will actually be familiar with the WHTS program and thus perhaps more willing to grant me transfer credits, so much the better.

Really, I feel worst (or, more properly, the deepest sympathy for) Dirk and Chaitania, who've had to spend so much money and time and blood/sweat/tears/etc. in pursuit of this. They do so much with so little, and it's criminal that their diligence and investment aren't being rewarded. They've done a lot for us-- I just wish I could think of a way to help them (kind of rich coming from someone who can barely help himself, I know, but still).

New Qi Gong teacher, besides being almost painfully Nordic, seems to be quite good-- I, at least, thoroughly enjoyed his class, much more so than any of the other meditations we've done. I still have a lot of work to do if I want to realize my full potential as a healthcare practitioner.
teiresias: (Default)
Last big didactic exam (excluding some psych bullshit) was today, and while I now know that I missed two or three points out of the 200 possible, I definitely passed. Actually, I'm a little miffed at how easy it was; I've been studying my ass off for a month, and I knew SO MUCH MORE than was on the test; I even wrote some of it in next to the official questions because I'd been making the associations for so long that I felt I had to use them.

I feel very good about everything in general, of course. I have some more bureaucratic odds and paper-pushing ends to wrap up before November, but now I'm quite confident that I'm prepared to put all this theory into practice.
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 Very energetically aware patient told me today that I "have the makings of a good healer." Rave reviews continue to accrue, it seems. I only hope I prove worthy of them when I finally strike out on my own. Helping people is all I want to do-- well, that and enjoy my life. Both, in equal measure, for there must always be balance. My intuition is good, that I know; now, I need the experience to back it up and the skill to apply it effectively.
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Have been volunteering at school more, helping out with the new class for some reason that escapes me, but it ended up being valuable for me, at least, so that's all well and good. I am here to be of service, and there's no shortage of opportunities to remind myself of that.

After I left, I felt this unprecedented sense of celebration, such that I decided to walk from Laurelhurst to the U Bookstore, thence to Northgate, thence home. I made a point of going down side streets that I'd never seen before, looking at the colors-- so many shades of green!-- and the houses and the sky and all the amazing things that so often get lost in the chatter. I didn't even have my iPod, which I'm grateful for because I got to experience the day in as unmediated a manner as I can without virtually blinding myself by taking off my glasses. I was even smiling at people, and making eye contact, for fuck's sake.

Apparently a noticeable shift in my energetic equilibrium has come about since Miss M started treating me on Earth. This only confirms what I've been feeling internally, but still, it's nice to have the external validation every now and again. Who knows what's possible now that I'm finally on the right track?
teiresias: (Default)
Have been volunteering at school more, helping out with the new class for some reason that escapes me, but it ended up being valuable for me, at least, so that's all well and good. I am here to be of service, and there's no shortage of opportunities to remind myself of that.

After I left, I felt this unprecedented sense of celebration, such that I decided to walk from Laurelhurst to the U Bookstore, thence to Northgate, thence home. I made a point of going down side streets that I'd never seen before, looking at the colors-- so many shades of green!-- and the houses and the sky and all the amazing things that so often get lost in the chatter. I didn't even have my iPod, which I'm grateful for because I got to experience the day in as unmediated a manner as I can without virtually blinding myself by taking off my glasses. I was even smiling at people, and making eye contact, for fuck's sake.

Apparently a noticeable shift in my energetic equilibrium has come about since Miss M started treating me on Earth. This only confirms what I've been feeling internally, but still, it's nice to have the external validation every now and again. Who knows what's possible now that I'm finally on the right track?
teiresias: (Default)
 Gave impromptu unscripted alma mater boosterism at SLC reception tonight, did not make too much of an ass of self, I hope. Certain parts were a little wobbly, but managed to avoid hemming and hawing and repeating myself over and over, and did not employ "like." There is a place for "like," of course, particularly when telling sardonic stories, but that place is not public speaking and certainly not in front of people one wishes to impress.

Got my Fire on. I think pretty well. And oh, they were all so fresh-faced and cute with their nervous eyes, trying to get as much information as possible to make this momentous decision-- and it is important, though not always in the ways we think. I felt a great outpouring of paternal affection, or at least as close to it as I ever get.
teiresias: (Default)
 Gave impromptu unscripted alma mater boosterism at SLC reception tonight, did not make too much of an ass of self, I hope. Certain parts were a little wobbly, but managed to avoid hemming and hawing and repeating myself over and over, and did not employ "like." There is a place for "like," of course, particularly when telling sardonic stories, but that place is not public speaking and certainly not in front of people one wishes to impress.

Got my Fire on. I think pretty well. And oh, they were all so fresh-faced and cute with their nervous eyes, trying to get as much information as possible to make this momentous decision-- and it is important, though not always in the ways we think. I felt a great outpouring of paternal affection, or at least as close to it as I ever get.
teiresias: (Default)
These past ten days have been some of the best of my life, internally. Nothing obvious or earth-shaking has changed on the outside, but I've been more comfortable in my own skin than I have been since I hit puberty. The constant internal struggle has almost entirely abated, and the sense of empathy/sympathy/compassion/etc. has been remarkable in its consistency. I can't say everything's perfect, but for the first time in a good long while, I feel like I have a base to stand on to get there-- not that perfection is ever really attainable short of death, but to me, even having a starting point whence one can imagine that kind of end result is huge. I know I have so much more work to do before I get to any of the places I really want to be, but now I know I can do it.
teiresias: (Default)
These past ten days have been some of the best of my life, internally. Nothing obvious or earth-shaking has changed on the outside, but I've been more comfortable in my own skin than I have been since I hit puberty. The constant internal struggle has almost entirely abated, and the sense of empathy/sympathy/compassion/etc. has been remarkable in its consistency. I can't say everything's perfect, but for the first time in a good long while, I feel like I have a base to stand on to get there-- not that perfection is ever really attainable short of death, but to me, even having a starting point whence one can imagine that kind of end result is huge. I know I have so much more work to do before I get to any of the places I really want to be, but now I know I can do it.
teiresias: (Default)
The concert last night was good, even though I can't say I have much appreciation for the Beatles. I understand their importance to history, but the music itself I just don't enjoy that much, either lyrically or melodically.

Spring has definitely arrived, no doubt in my mind-- it's sandals weather pretty much exclusively from here on out,and in addition to the warmth, the air has a different energetic quality on the spirit level, something to do with pushing out, moving with purpose beyond the heavy,crushing stasis of winter. Much as I love the colder months, there's something ineffable about the renewal of the year-- not as hot as summer and late summer, but still awakening us to the possibilities inherent in the turning of the year.
teiresias: (Default)
The concert last night was good, even though I can't say I have much appreciation for the Beatles. I understand their importance to history, but the music itself I just don't enjoy that much, either lyrically or melodically.

Spring has definitely arrived, no doubt in my mind-- it's sandals weather pretty much exclusively from here on out,and in addition to the warmth, the air has a different energetic quality on the spirit level, something to do with pushing out, moving with purpose beyond the heavy,crushing stasis of winter. Much as I love the colder months, there's something ineffable about the renewal of the year-- not as hot as summer and late summer, but still awakening us to the possibilities inherent in the turning of the year.
teiresias: (Default)
I had an interesting little epiphany today, to wit: I get along pretty well with Wood CFs, if only because I like to have someone else driving change and herding the cats of humanity; I'm not any good at it and I invariably find the experience frustrating. I have no desire whatsoever to be a leader, and I have a lot of respect for those who have the ability to persuade large groups of people to do anything. The way I work is just to do my part (and a big part that is) and try to make sure that I'm discharging my responsibilities well.

In other news, I am apparently now the assistant librarian at WHTS. Now, if only I could get paid...
teiresias: (Default)
I had an interesting little epiphany today, to wit: I get along pretty well with Wood CFs, if only because I like to have someone else driving change and herding the cats of humanity; I'm not any good at it and I invariably find the experience frustrating. I have no desire whatsoever to be a leader, and I have a lot of respect for those who have the ability to persuade large groups of people to do anything. The way I work is just to do my part (and a big part that is) and try to make sure that I'm discharging my responsibilities well.

In other news, I am apparently now the assistant librarian at WHTS. Now, if only I could get paid...

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